Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
