Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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