hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
