All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
