what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
