If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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