I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
