I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
