That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
