I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
