If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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