She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
