I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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