I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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