is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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