I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize