dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
