Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
