i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
