let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
