I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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