Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
