Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Help. Why am I so naked?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
