she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
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