I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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