She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize