Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I AM VODKA MAN
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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