hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
