you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
