i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
