Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize