: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
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