goodnight i made you a song goodbye
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
