ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Drunk walkin through police station. America
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
