So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
it's like heaven, but drunker
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
