I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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