My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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