your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
