ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize