butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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