you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize