Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
