I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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