no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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