What a fucking waste of an outfit
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
