ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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