so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Randomize
