Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
