you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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