Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
